Hey y’all, you already know I’m praying that today is nothing less than amazing for you. Don’t let anyone or anything get you down; it’s a new, unpromised day, so let us rejoice. Let’s get into it. So… let’s talk about healing. Don’t pick up your bags and leave just yet. Follow me. I’m not talking about the kind of healing that society has overdone, over-intellectualized, where everything is considered toxic and accountability is viewed as judgment. I’m talking about healing that’s rooted in genuinely working on yourself inwardly; putting in the effort to change patterns and break cycles so you can show up for the people around you in a healthy way. Trust me, we all have things to work on. Even myself. I had a conversation with my friend who said she didn’t know what she was doing wrong in her connections and relationships, and I told her plainly: it’s all deeply connected to the state of her healing, or lack thereof. Healing isn’t just for you; it’s for the people around you. It’s the medicine for yourself and the antidote for those you love. When you begin to heal, you learn how to articulate your emotions, strengthen your conflict resolution skills (spoiler: that’s a muscle only developed through actual conflict), and unlearn toxic behaviors passed down to you or projected onto you. The solution is not suppressing your feelings, burying them, or ghosting like Casper the unfriendly ghost. You have to face it head-on. When you look in the mirror, you’re not just seeing your face; you’re seeing the condition of your heart. Scripture makes it clear that how we show up in the world is a direct reflection of our heart.

“A good person produces good things from the treasury of a good heart, and an evil person produces evil things from the treasury of an evil heart. What you say flows from what is in your heart. “

Luke 6:45 NLT

So, where do we go from here if we don’t know how to heal or where to start? Journaling. It gives you introspection and space to reflect. Then go beyond yourself and seek help: a trustworthy friend, a therapist, or even, if resources are limited, tools like ChatGPT. I’ve seen people use what they have, and it’s still valid. Lastly, books. There is so much wisdom hidden in the treasure of a good book. I’ll leave a few of my favorites below. I encourage you to just start. Lean in, not away. And remember: healing takes time. It is not an overnight process. You can’t expect to undo 20, 30, or 40 years of conditioning in a few months. Be patient with yourself. Place yourself in spaces that are safe, nurturing, and conducive to your growth. Be gentle. Be faithful. Be blessed.

---

Book Recommendations

The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk

Attached by Amir Levine & Rachel Heller

All About Love by bell hooks

Lighter by Yung Pueblo

And lastly, my all-time favorite (for my married people, desiring to be married, or soon to be married), Love & Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs